


Closure

by Tangerinebabe



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Implied/Referenced Cheating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-05-31 02:36:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15110051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tangerinebabe/pseuds/Tangerinebabe
Summary: Clarke and Lexa had an affair and ran away together. Now they return home to answer for their actions.





	Closure

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all,  
> I've been struggling for months with the worse case of writers block I've ever had.  
> I've been using this as a way to try and work though it, just doing a couple of paragraphs at a time so some of it may feel disjointed.  
> This isn't my best work, but it's been helping me get back into the swing of writing.  
> Hope you all enjoy, let me know what you all think and as always Kudos are appreciated.

Over 5 years ago, Clarke and Lexa disappeared without a trace leaving their respective partners devastated. The strange thing about it was that no one even knew that they knew each other. It was only the letters that the pair had left their friends and family that told them the truth of the what was happening. In truth, they had been cowards the way in which they had left, but they could only see one way for them to be together and that was for them to leave their friends and families behind. 

They had met at the gallery opening of up and coming artists. Clarke’s boyfriend Bellamy and Lexa girlfriend Costia had no interest in art and this lead to Clarke and Lexa being at the event alone. If just one of their partners had attended the event then the pair may never have met and they certainly wouldn’t have ended up in a hotel room together that night. The next morning, they had both regretted their actions and left vowing that they would never see each other again. 

Fate had other ideas though because they met several more times at the local on campus coffee shop. The first time they exchanged a quick nod of acknowledgement, but nothing more. After the third time of seeing each other in less than a week however, they had their first conversation since the night they had met. This led to them meeting regularly for coffee, which led them to swapping phone numbers and that eventually led to them having a full-blown affair with each other. They both knew that it was wrong, but there was just something that kept pulling them together. They were like a drug to each other and neither had the will power to give up their addictions. 

With them both being in their final year of college it was easy for them to explain their absences to Bellamy and Costia as them having to study. They went from meeting up once a week to seeing each other every other day and sometimes five or six days a week. This went on for most of their senior year until their college lives were nearing their end. They both knew that they only had a few more months together before they would be forced to join the real world. By this point they both knew that they wanted to be together because they were head over heels in love with one another, but they both felt like they had things holding them to Bellamy and Costia that they couldn’t get rid of.

Clarke’s mom, Abby and her dad, Jake, loved Bellamy like a son and Bellamy’s younger sister Octavia was her best friend. She knew that if she broke up with him then she would not only lose her best friend, but she would also have to deal with her dad being disappointed in her and her mother would likely disown her for not being the perfect daughter that she had raised her to be. The rest of their friend group would also be forced to choose between them and because it was her that was in the wrong, they would also choose Bellamy as well. She couldn’t bear with bumping into people that used to be her friends, but would now look at her like what she was, a cheater.

Lexa’s father, Titus, would never allow Lexa to leave Costia because he was in business with Costia’s father and they had planned for their daughters to marry from when they both came out as gay in their early teens. The fact that the rest of Lexa’s family loves Costia as well made her feel like she had to marry her or be the family disappointment like she has been all of her life. Even her best friend Anya thought that Costia was the best thing that had ever happened to Lexa so she knew that she would have to deal with a very angry Anya, which is something that nobody wants to deal with.

It wasn’t until the day that Titus had given Lexa an engagement ring to propose to Costia with, that Clarke and Lexa knew that they had to make a decision. They could either carry on as they were, sleeping together ever chance they got and run the risk of being caught whilst hurting themselves and their loved ones in the process. They could stop their affair and break both of their hearts. They could break up with Bellamy and Costia and face the consequences, having their families and friends interfering in their relationship constantly if they even spoke to them at all. Or their final option was to run away together after they graduated college and be together without outside interferences and without people judging them for how they got together in the first place. They chose to leave.

They both started applying for jobs on the other side of the country and a week before they were due to graduate, Lexa was offered a job at a publishing house in New York. It was only three days later that Clarke had a telephone interview with an art gallery in New York and was offered the job the day before graduation. They found a fully furnished apartment online and paid a deposit to hold the apartment for them so they only had to sign the lease when they got to there. 

Three weeks after their graduation they packed up Lexa’s truck and left Polis in the middle of the night. Lexa left her letters to her friends and family on her father’s desk in his study, along with the engagement ring that Titus had given to her propose to Costia with. Clarke had left her letters on the table in her parent’s kitchen. They were both well aware that what they were doing was both cowardly and wrong, but they just wanted to be together so badly that they would do anything for it. Even if that meant hurting the people that they loved. 

To say that everyone had been stunned at their departure would be an understatement. Abby and Jake had sought out Titus is an effort to find out where the two women had gone, but he was as clueless as they were. This meeting lead to Bellamy and Octavia meeting Costia and Anya. At first, they all wanted to find Lexa and Clarke, but they had no idea where to begin. The police wouldn’t help as they were both adults that had left of their own volition and the pair had changed their phone numbers and all of their social media accounts had disappeared. Looking for the couple brought their two friend groups together and they also became each other’s friends as well. After six months of not being able to find the couple most of them gave up, but Jake didn’t. He was determined to find his little girl and find out why she had left like she had. 

*******

It took three years, but Jake finally found an article online that mentioned Clarke’s art being displayed at the gallery that she worked at. Jake didn’t want to spook his daughter with too many people so he went to New York on his own and told people that he was going there on a business trip. As soon as he had dumped his luggage in his hotel room, he went down to the gallery that had been mentioned in the article hoping and praying that the Clarke that was mentioned was in fact his daughter. 

When he got to the gallery he could see that it was closed, but he knocked on the door anyway to see if anyone would answer. When it became obvious that nobody was there he decided to sit in the park opposite the gallery and just wait a while to see if anyone turned up there. He knew from the online article that the show wasn’t until tomorrow, but he hoped that someone might turn up to set up the exhibition. 

He had only been sat in the park around half an hour when he heard someone laughing and shouting, “Don’t you dare Lexa.” He recognised that voice instantly, Clarke. Turning to his left he spotted someone with blonde hair running across the grass with a brunette chasing her. He could see that the blonde was Clarke and that she was laughing so hard that she was having trouble running away from the brunette, who he realised must be Lexa. Watching the couple, he couldn’t help but smile at how happy Clarke appeared to be. He had never seen her that happy with Bellamy or even her first boyfriend Finn. 

He watched as Lexa caught up to Clarke and pick her up around her waist with one arm whilst the other held an ice cream cone. He could hear Clarke shriek as Lexa pushed the ice cream into the blonde’s cheek and then he could hear the brunette’s laughter as she let Clarke go and ran over to a bin to throw the rest of the ice cream away. He couldn’t help but chuckle at the indignant look on Clarke’s face. The blonde then ran straight at Lexa and jumped into her waiting arms wrapping her legs around the brunette’s waist and her arms around her neck before smearing her ice cream covered cheek all over Lexa’s face. 

The whole seen made Jake smile. He has been so worried about Clarke over the last few years and now to see that she is safe and happy, warms his heart. He watches his daughters face as she looks down at Lexa before she leans down to kiss the brunette. It’s not a deep passionate kiss, but it’s a kiss that a couple can only really have when they are completely and utterly in love with each other. Just by looking at the couple he can see how much they love each other and he begins to realise why they left. They wouldn’t have been able to be so open, as they are being now, back in Polis without judgement being rained down on them. It would have been a miracle if they would have stayed together this long if they hadn’t had left. 

He doesn’t want to spoil the moment between the two women so he stays seated and waits for Lexa to put Clarke back on the ground. When she does he can Lexa wrap her arm around Clarke’s shoulders and the blonde wrap both arms around the brunette’s waist, snuggling into her, before they start walking towards the gallery, still laughing and joking with each other. He gets up and follows them across the street. As soon as he can see that they have entered the gallery he goes and knocks on the door. It doesn’t take long for Clarke to answer and her jaw to drop to the floor. 

“Dad, w-what are you doing here?” Clarke stutters out. After three years of nobody finding them she had assumed that they had all just stopped looking. That’s the only reason that she has finally allowed her work to be shown in the gallery because she really didn’t think that anyone would still be looking for them. Now that her dad is here though, she has a sense of dread that he has brought her mother and even worse that he could have brought Bellamy with him. 

“Hi princess, I’ve been looking for you and when I saw your name in an article online about a show that this place is doing, I jumped on a plane and came right here. I’ve missed you so much.” He says as he brings her into a hug. It takes her a couple of seconds to reciprocate the hug, but she can’t help but fall into her dad’s arms. She has missed her dad more than anyone else, but she just couldn’t get in touch with him because of the fear of seeing the disappointed look he would give her.

They pull back and Clarke is still in shock so she doesn’t really know what to say. She just motions for Jake to come into the gallery and he does so. Just as he enters Lexa walks out of the bathroom where she had gone to wash the ice cream off her face that Clarke had smeared on it in the park. “Babe, you know I love you, but I put the ice cream on your face not mine and now my face still feels sticky in some places even though I’ve just washed it. Have you got any face wipes in your office?” Lexa is walking to another door on the other side of the gallery, not even paying attention to a frozen Clarke and an amused Jake still stood by the door.

Clarke excuses herself and follows Lexa into the blonde’s office. Jake can hear the two women talking in hushed whispers and frowns when he hears Clarke’s voice sounding upset. It’s only a few minutes later that the couple walk out of the office with clean faces and holding hands. Jake can see that Clarke is gripping Lexa’s hand as tightly as she can and it’s obvious that she is nervous which breaks his heart. He has always been so close to his daughter and he thought that she felt that she could tell him anything, but he was wrong. 

“Hello, Mr Griffin, I’m Lexa Woods it’s nice to meet you.” Lexa steps forward and holds her hand out as she introduces herself. The only thing about running away that Lexa had really regretted was that she didn’t get to meet Clarke’s father after Clarke had spoken so highly of him. She wishes that her own father could have supported her the way that Jake has supported Clarke all of her life, but she also understood that Clarke couldn’t bear to see her father disappointed in her so that’s why she chose not to tell him that they were leaving. 

Jake shakes the brunette’s hand and then pulls her into a hug surprising Lexa. It takes her a second, but Lexa falls into the hug and can’t help, but smile at the reception that she is getting from Jake. “It’s nice to meet you as well, but I wish I could have met you three years ago before the pair of you ran away.” Jake says as he lets Lexa out of the hug. The brunette immediately goes back to Clarke’s side and wraps her arm around the blonde’s waist showing Jake a united front. 

“I’m sorry daddy, but we had to leave. If we had stayed in Polis then mom would have made me marry Bellamy or she would have disowned me and Lexa would have been forced to marry Costia when all we wanted was to be together.” Clarke chokes out. This is the one confrontation that she has been dreading more than any other because of how close she has always been to her dad. Having him look at her with any disappointment or hurt in his eyes would destroy her so she chose the cowards way out.

“Why don’t we take this into Clarke’s office so we can all sit down and talk about this properly?” Lexa suggests and gets a nod of the head from both Clarke and Jake. They all go into Clarke’s office and make themselves comfortable with Lexa and Clarke on the couch and Jake sat on one of the chairs. 

“I just want to know why you left the way that you did, I mean no one even knew that you two even knew each other and suddenly you’ve both given up your families, friends, hell your whole lives back in Polis and disappeared without a trace. I get that you wanted to be together, but you could have at least let us all know that you were both still alive, do you know how worried we’ve all been?” Jake asks. He understands that they wanted to be together, but that is no reason for them to leave as abruptly as they did. 

“If we didn’t leave like we did then my father would have forced me to stay and me and Clarke wouldn’t have been able to be together.” Lexa says and Jake looks really confused at this so she continues, “My dad basically runs Polis from behind the scenes. He has the mayor, police department and most of local government in his back pocket. He wanted me to marry Costia because she is the daughter of one of his biggest business partners. Don’t get me wrong, at one point I really thought that I could love her, but then I met Clarke and I knew that she was it for me.” At this Lexa looks at Clarke with undying love written all over her face and Clarke looks back at her the same way. “If I had broken up with Costia, my dad would have made sure that I couldn’t get a job anywhere in the city and that I would be ruined before I could even start my career.” Jake is shocked at what Lexa has just said, but when he thinks about it, he can believe it’s true. 

Before Lexa can carry on, Clarke starts talking, “Dad, you know that mom has wanted me and Bellamy together since we were kids. If I suddenly turned around and said, ‘I’m breaking up with Bellamy and I’m going to be with another woman’ mom would have lost her mind. It would have torn mine and Bellamy friends apart and I couldn’t stand to see you disappointed in me so I left. I love Lexa with all my heart and if running away was the only way that I could be with her, without her father and my mother and friends getting involved in our relationship, was to leave, then I would do it again and again.” Clarke says. She means every word that she has just said and hopes that her dad will get where she is coming from with this.

“Okay, I understand that, but were you ever going to come back, I mean were you ever going to let us know that you’re both alive, safe and happy?” Jake has to ask. He missed his daughter over the past three years, but more than that he was worried about her safety and happiness. All he has ever wanted is for his little girl to be happy and if she is happy now then he will respect her decision to leave, even if he doesn’t fully understand it or like it.

“We gave our selves five years.” Lexa starts. “If after five years we were still happy together and we were settled in our lives, then we were going to come back to Polis to visit, but if we broke up before then we agreed that we would both go back to Polis anyway, so yes, we were going to go back eventually.” They knew that they would have to go home and face the music eventually, but they both wanted to make sure that they were working well together before they did. They thought that if they had been together for five years then they could prove to their families and friends that they are together for the foreseeable future and not just a flash in the pan romance.

“I’m not going to say that I’m happy with how you left, but I can understand your reasons. The fact that you have a plan about when to come back to Polis and face the consequences of your actions pleases me because it means that you weren’t going to stay away for ever. When you are ready to come home, even if it’s just for a visit, I will try my best to talk to Abby and calm her, but I can’t guarantee that my words will have any impact on her. You also both owe Bellamy and Costia an apology.” All he wants if for his daughter to feel safe enough to come home, but he knows that she did wrong and that both girls owe several apologies to people, the main ones being to the people that they were in relationships with. 

“Wait, does that mean you won’t tell anyone where we are?” Lexa asks. She always had a feeling that they would be found, but so far Jake has been respectful and somewhat understanding. Clarke and Lexa both know that they aren’t ready to go back to Polis so if Jake will keep quiet about where they are for just a little bit longer, then they can both prepare mentally for the trip back. 

“I’ll stay quiet for now, but not forever. I want you both to keep in touch with me and I will come out and see you as often as I can. I’m letting you play out your plan, so you have another two years before I expect you both to come back to Polis and face everyone. If you don’t come back by then, I will tell Abby and I will also tell Titus where you both are. That’s the deal, take it or leave it.” Jake will respect the couple’s original plan, but he will also make sure that they follow through with it. 

Both women except the terms and Jake then spends the next couple of hours getting to know Lexa better as well as spending some long overdue time with his daughter. He stayed in New York for a couple of days and went to the Gallery exhibition to see Clarke’s work. He even went to the couple’s apartment for dinner on his last night. All in all, the trip had been more then worth it because even though he had to keep it a secret, he had his daughter back in his life.

*******

The next two years went by in a flash for the couple and before they knew it, it was time for them to head back to Polis. They decided to go back just after thanksgiving so that they could visit the Christmas Market that happens in the centre of Polis ever December. Jake picked them up from the airport and drove them to the hotel that they had decided to stay at for their trip. They didn’t feel like they could just turn up at either of their parents houses and stay there. The plan was for them to relax for their first day back and then to go and visit Abby on their second day. The rest of the people that they needed to see, they would sort out after they had spoken to Abby. They had dropped their stuff of at the hotel and then decided to go and have a look around the market.

Costia, Anya, Raven, Octavia, Lincoln, Echo and Bellamy were all sat in a café that overlooked the main area that the Christmas market was situated. They all came to the market together every year since Lexa and Clarke had disappeared. Thinking that this was going to be just like the previous years, they were having a coffee before they started their hunt for Christmas presents. They were all smiling and joking around when Anya spotted a familiar head of curly chestnut hair. 

Straining her neck to get a better look, Anya inadvertently said out loud, “It can’t be.” The whole table stopped what they were doing and looked at Anya wondering what the hell she was going on about. 

“What can’t be?” Raven asked, turning around in her seat to try and see what Anya was looking at so intensely. It was then that Raven spotted a face that she hadn’t seen in over five years. “No way.” Now the whole table was looking at both Anya and Raven wondering why they had both gone so quiet and were staring out of the window. “Clarke.” Raven stated and the whole table was up looking out of the window within seconds. 

“Oh my god that’s Lexa.” Costia said just as Lexa turned around to face Clarke and pull her into a chaste kiss. The whole group stood in shock as they watched the seemingly happy couple walk away further into the crowds of the market. They could see them laughing and joking as Lexa had her arm around Clarke’s shoulders and Clarke wrapped both arms around Lexa’s waist, snuggling into the brunette as they disappeared into the crowd of shoppers. 

“Who’s Clarke and Lexa?” Echo asked. She has only been dating Bellamy for around two months and she has heard about Clarke in passing, but never got the full story about her. All she knows is that Clarke went missing years ago and no one has heard from her since. 

“Clarke is my ex and Lexa is the woman that she was having an affair with behind my back. Lexa is Costia’s ex that she was still with when she was sleeping with Clarke. They ran away together over five years ago and no one has seen or heard from them since. Now it looks like they’re back.” Bellamy says. His head is spinning with what they have just seen. When Clarke left Polis, he thought that she would realise her mistake and come back to him within a month. He really thought that they were meant to be and that she would see that after a while. Now though, he had just seen with his own eyes that she was still happy and obviously in love with the woman that she left him for. It was a serious kick in the gut for him and he suspected that Costia felt the same by the look on her face. 

“We need to ring Abby.” Raven told everyone. They all know that she is right, but they are still processing what just happened. Raven grabs her phone and goes outside before ringing Abby. The rest of the group are all still sat there is shock. They all thought that they would never see Clarke or Lexa again because they have been gone for so long. Now that they have been surprised by the couples unexpected appearance, they didn’t know what to do.

Raven came back into the café a few minutes later and told them, “Jake already knew that they were here, apparently he found them a couple of years ago and has been in touch with them ever since. He wants to organise a meeting with them tomorrow at his and Abby’s house.” Again, the whole group don’t know what to say. The fact that Jake has been pretending that he doesn’t know where they are when he did, is almost more shocking than seeing Clarke and Lexa again after so long. 

“I’m going, I need to hear from their own mouths what happened not some stupid letter. Maybe this will be the closure that I need.” Costia says. She has never been able to fully move on from what happened because she has so many questions. Lexa leaving was completely unexpected because she had found a ring in Lexa’s draw and thought that Lexa was going to propose to her. 

“I’m going as well.” Bellamy says. He was so ready to move in with Clarke and start their life together properly that when she left he had no idea what was going on. At first her thought that is was a prank, but then he met Costia and realised that it wasn’t a joke at all. Just like Costia, he has questions about what really happened and why they left like they did. 

The rest of the group all agree that they want to go as well. Instead of going shopping, the group decide to call it a day and head home so that they can all prepare for the next day when they will be finally getting the answers that they have wanted for over five years. 

********

When Jake had rung Clarke, to tell her that she and Lexa had been spotted at the Christmas market, she had felt sick. She really wanted to speak to her mother before she met up with everyone else, but now she and Lexa were going to have to face everyone at once. Lexa had been slightly calmer about the whole situation, but behind the strong front that she was putting on, Clarke could see that’s he was just as nervous. The fact that Anya and Costia were going to be there as well came as somewhat of a surprise to the couple, but Jake had told them that they had all become friends when Clarke and Lexa had first left so it made a lot more sense after that. 

The next day Jake went to the hotel to pick them up and drive them to Clarke’s childhood home. Clarke wanted to show Lexa the house where she has grown up in, but she knew that they would have to get through reuniting with their friends and Clarke’s mom first. Pulling up outside the house, Jake can see that Clarke is obviously nervous so he leaves the couple outside to gather themselves and he goes inside to see if everyone is there yet. It only takes him a couple of minutes to make sure and when he has moved everyone into the lounge area, he goes back outside to get Clarke and Lexa.

Walking into the house is a surreal experience for Clarke. This is a house that she knew so well, but she can see that certain parts of it have been changed since she has been gone. Jake gives her a comforting smile as they walk into the lounge, but when he moves she is faced with her past. Looking around she can see that Bellamy, Octavia, Abby, Raven, Lincoln and who she knows is Costia and Anya, though she has never met in person, are all sat around the room, with a two-seater couch left for them to sit on. No one make any sort of move to greet the couple so they just go and sit down. 

Jake clears his throat to try and get rid of some of the awkward atmosphere. “Okay, so I know that you all have questions for Clarke and Lexa, you probably have a few for me as well, but I think we should let Bellamy and Costia start because they were the people most affected by this.” He tells the room. He can see that Abby is about to protest, but he shoots her a look that makes her back down instantly. 

Both Costia and Bellamy share a look before Costia indicates for him to go first because as soon as Lexa walked into the room, all of her questions disappeared out of her head. “How could you do that to me?” Bellamy says as he looks directly at Clarke. “I would have given you the world and you couldn’t even stay faithful to me. All you left any of us, were some crappy letters. I want to know how it started, who initiated it, where you’ve been and how you both could leave without an explanation to any of us? What did I do so wrong that you could treat me like that?” He was going to try and take his time with everything, but the questions that he has been asking himself for the past five years all come rushing out. 

Clarke and Lexa share a look before Clarke grabs Lexa’s hand and starts talking. “This is going to sound like such a cliché, but you did nothing wrong. Lexa and I fell in love and even though we tried to stay away from each other, we just couldn’t. I honestly thought that I was in love with you, but then I met Lexa and I knew that I only loved you as a friend.” Bellamy scoffs at that answer and Clarke grips Lexa hand tighter. He really thought that she was in love with him and a part of him has always hoped that she would realise that and come back to him, but he was seriously wrong. 

“That’s what you’re going with, it’s not you it’s me bullshit?” Octavia asks. She was as shocked as everyone when Clarke left, but she could tell that the blonde had been off for months. Always making excuses to not go out with the gang, not going on dates with Bellamy. It may have been the end of the school year, but even after finals happened Clarke was still nowhere to be seen. 

“It sounds rubbish, but it’s true. Do you remember the exhibition at the start of my senior year that I had three pieces in?” Clarke asks and Bellamy has to think for a second before nodding his head. “You were meant to be my date for it, but you backed out last minute because the museum had a new exhibition the next morning so you wanted to have an early night so you could get there early the next morning. I was so excited about it because it was my first real show and I felt like you let me down. My head was all over the place when I got there so I went to get a drink to calm myself down. That was the night I met Lexa and the first night that we slept together.” Clarke tells them all. She isn’t proud of how her and Lexa met, but she wouldn’t change it for the world and she needs everyone to know the whole truth. 

Costia has been staring at Lexa from the moment that she walked in, but hearing Clarke say that, something clicks in her mind. “Was that the exhibition that was on Ontari’s birthday and I forgot about it? The one that we had a huge argument about and you went on your own?” Costia remembers that night vividly because she and Lexa had never argued like that before and she couldn’t get in touch with Lexa till late the next morning. She even went to Lexa’s apartment but there was no answer, now she knows why.

“Yes,” Lexa says before clearing her throat, “I was so angry at you for ditching me for the one girl I hated more than anyone else, when I was trying to surprise you with the fact that I had some of my photos in the exhibition, photos of you. I’m not saying that it was anyone’s fault but mine and Clarke’s, but I just need you to know what head space we were both in. When I got there, I headed straight to the bar to get a strong drink and I met Clarke. We started talking and drinking, then we headed to a bar to carry on drinking before ending up in a hotel room together. The next morning, we agreed that it was a mistake and we went our separate ways, but I couldn’t get her out of my head after.” Lexa wants everything to be out in the open, just like Clarke does, but she hates talking about certain aspects of their relationship and would rather be anywhere else but there.

“So, you chased after Clarke?” Bellamy practically hisses at her. He doesn’t like the fact they had sex the first night of meeting, but if Lexa had have stayed away, then he and Clarke could have worked things out and been happy together.

“No, she didn’t,” Clarke says. “it was mutual. I felt the same way as she did and we bumped into each other accidentally in the campus coffee shop, Tondc. At first, we barely acknowledged each other, but after we kept bumping into each other we started talking. That led to us meeting up for coffee and swapping numbers. Eventually we stated to meet up in bars and for lunch most days, which usually ended up with us in bed with each other. It was completely mutual, I just couldn’t stay away from her no matter how hard I tried.” Clarke could see the small glimmer of hope in Bellamy’s eyes, that she had been coerced into a relationship, but that just wasn’t the truth. 

“What do you meant that you tried to stay away from her?” Abby asks. If Clarke had tried to stay away from Lexa, then she should have let her go. It sounds to Abby like, Lexa pursued her and not like it was that mutual at all.

“We were at a Christmas party just before winter break and I didn’t know that Lexa was going to be going with Costia. When they turned up and I saw them together, I felt ridiculously jealous. It was then that I realised that I had real feeling for Lexa. I went home early that night and just sat and thought about everything. We hadn’t even talked about breaking up with either of Bellamy or Costia so I was really scared. I text Lexa the next day to stop the affair and we didn’t see each other again until we ran into each other at Octavia’s birthday party at the Arc in late January. We met up the next day and talked about things, both of us admitting our feelings, but we both knew that we couldn’t be together until after we graduated. We decided to carry as we were before and then make up our minds after graduation about what we would do.” Clarke tells everyone. Octavia look like she is about to blow up, but Lincoln says something in her ear to make her calm down slightly. 

“What things?” Bellamy asks and Clarke is confused for a second as he continues, “You said that you needed to think about things after you left the party, what things?”. He already has a good idea what she was thinking about, but he wants her to confirm it. 

“I thought about everything.” This answer gets an irritated huff from Octavia so Clarke decides to go into more detail. “I thought about how I’d never felt about anyone the way that I do for Lexa. I thought about how I’d never been a sexual person with you or Finn, but for some reason I could keep my hands of her. The sex mattered in a way that it never had with anyone else. I thought about how she would never leave Costia for me and that I needed to end it before I ended up even more heartbroken that I would have then. I thought about if I was willing to give up my family and friends for her because by leaving you I would have had to. I thought about a lot of things.” Clarke explains hurriedly. She doesn’t want to go into that much detail, but she is willing to if it gives Bellamy some closure. 

“Is that why you were so quiet all over Christmas and through January, because you were missing Lexa?” Raven talks for the first time. She has never been very close to Clarke, but she knew that the blonde was dealing with something back then, she just didn’t know how to ask her about it. Clarke just nods her head in reply as Lexa puts her arm around Clarke and pulls her into her side before kissing her temple in a reassuring gesture. 

“So, the plan was to keep stringing me and Bellamy along until you could be bothered to make up your minds? What about the ring I found in your draw, was that for Clarke?” Costia asks. Lexa can see the hurt in Costia’s face and she knows that she owes her the truth. She didn’t know that Costia had found the ring that her father had given her and she knows that, that must have made it a hundred times harder when she left.

“No, that ring was for you, my dad gave it to me in mid-March and told me that I was to pro-prose to you by the end of summer. After he gave it to me, I knew that me and Clarke had to make a decision about what we were going to do. If we had stayed in Polis then we couldn’t be together, but if we left we could be together only we would lose all our families and friends. We started applying for jobs on the east coast, but we still didn’t know for certain that we were leaving until a week before graduation when I got offered a job at a publishing house in New York. A few days later Clarke got offered a job in New York as well so we decided to leave and be together.” Lexa explains. The last thing that they wanted to do was hurt anyone, but they had to be together. They knew that they are the loves of each other’s lives, that’s not something that they could turn their backs on. 

“You always hated the idea of going into publishing.” Anya speaks up for the first time. Lexa had almost forgot that she was here because she was never this quiet before she left, but maybe they have all changed over the past five and a half years. 

“I needed a job before we left and that job was just a way for me to be able to leave. I quit after 18 months and started working as a professional photographer after I got some of my work shown in Becca Pramheda gallery. Some people liked my work and started asking for commissions as well as buying some of my older pieces. Becca also hired me as the official photographer of her gallery as well as continuing to show some of my pieces regularly. Earlier this year Becca asked me if I wanted to buy part of the business of her so that she could take more time off and after I spoke with my bank, I agreed.” Lexa explains. This is something else that never would have happened if she stayed in Polis because her dad expected her to take over from him when he retired so he wouldn’t have allowed her to have, in his opinion, a pointless carer. 

“What about you Clarke? What do you do?” Abby asks. She wants to make sure that Clarke isn’t sacrificing her own dreams so that Lexa can have hers. She has only just met the brunette, but she has already decided that Bellamy would be much better for her daughter because she can’t have a normal life living with another woman. They can’t even have kids that are both theirs and Abby knows that children have always been important to Clarke. 

“I got a job working at a gallery and after a few years they showed some of my work, which did really well. A year ago, I became a full-time artist and I’m doing better than I ever could have imagined. We’ve even managed to buy ourselves an apartment because we are both doing so well.” Clarke says with a smile. She doesn’t want to rub it in any one’s faces, but has she life that she has always dreamed of and she won’t hide that from anyone. They both struggled when they first got to New York, but now they are really happy. 

“How long have you known where they were Jake?” Bellamy asks. After his dad died when he was young, he has always looked at Jake like a father figure and now he feels somewhat betrayed by the man. He wants to know how long Jake has been lying to him.

“Two years ago, I found an article about an exhibition happening in New York that had Clarke’s name attached to it, so I jumped on a plane went out to see if it was in fact her and it was. I’ve been out to visit them a few times since and kept in contact with them both regularly. They had a time frame of how they planned to return and I let them carry on as long as they stuck to their time frame. That’s why I didn’t tell anyone where they were because I knew that they would be coming back and I didn’t want them to disappear again.” Jake explains. He knew that he would be brought into this at some point and he doesn’t like that he hid things from people that he loves for so long, but he was terrified that Clarke would simply disappear again only this time he wouldn’t be able to find her. 

“Jake wanted to tell you all, but we asked him not to because from the beginning we always planned to come back either if we broke up or if we were still together five years later. If we broke up then we would have come back and had this conversation then, but now that we have been together for five years and are still going strong means that we can prove that this wasn’t some meaningless fling. That was always the plan and Jake agreed, but said that he would tell all of you if we didn’t stick to it.” Lexa tells them all. She doesn’t want Jake to face any repercussions because of her and Clarke’s wishes. 

“But you’ve been gone for longer than five years.” Octavia spits at them. She doesn’t care about their plans to come back or even how happy they appear to be together. She just wants to know why they felt that it was okay for them to start sleeping together when they were already in relationships. She is only here for answers, not any bullshit about good intentions.

“We had some things that came up and had to deal with them before we could come and visit.” Clarke tells them, which only aggravates Octavia more because of the vagueness of the answer. They are meant to be hear so that Clarke and Lexa can explain everything to them only now Clarke starts holding things back from them. 

Standing up, Octavia nearly throws herself at with all of the rage that she has felt towards the blonde over the past five and a half years. Before she can get to her though, Lexa pushes her back. “You need to back off before you get yourself hurt.” Lexa says. Octavia almost scoffs at her before she can see the panic in Anya and Lincolns eyes. 

“Of course, you won’t fight your own battles, princess Clarke. You always have to have someone else to protect you. Well this bitch isn’t going to stop me from giving you the ass kicking you deserve.” Octavia tries to move towards Clarke again, but feels Lincolns arms wrap around her to stop her. She tries to fight against his hold, but can’t break free. Then the whole room stops at what Lexa says next.

“If you think that I’m going to let you touch my pregnant wife then you’re fucking deluded. My nickname wasn’t the commander at Indra’s gym for nothing. I could kick yours, Lincoln’s and Anya ass all at the same time so BACK THE FUCK OFF.” Lexa shouts directly in Octavia’s face. Lexa feels Clarke wrap an arm around her waist and guide her out of the room. She make’s sure that Clarke is behind her the whole time as the blonde takes her to the kitchen to cool off. 

When they get to the kitchen, Lexa turns around and hugs Clarke whilst whispering “I’m sorry.” into blonde hair. She knows that Clarke hates it when she loses her temper, but there was just no stopping it from happening then. They stay like this for a few minutes until Clarke can feel Lexa heartbeat starts to slow down and go back to its usual rhythm. Clarke pulls back and kisses her wife’s plump lips. Lexa sighs into the kiss and wraps her arms protectively around the blonde’s waist. 

“You have nothing to be sorry about. You were protecting your wife and child. Don’t ever be sorry for that.” Clarke tells her as she looks into the green eyes that she loves so much. Most of the time she doesn’t need protection, but right now she is still so early in her pregnancy that she doesn’t want to take any chances with her little squid, as Lexa likes to call the baby.

“Do you want to leave? If you want to, we can leave right now. They have all of the answers that they need so we can just go.” Lexa tells her wife. She doesn’t care what these people think of either of them. If Clarke wants to go, then that’s what they will do. She will not put her wife and unborn child through any unneeded pressure. 

“No, let’s just go back in there and finish this, then we can all move on properly with our lives.” Clarke says. The couple share one last kiss and quick ‘I love you’ before they head back to the lounge again. As they get closer to the lounge, they can hear Jake saying that he knew nothing about the pregnancy.

“We didn’t want to tell anyone until we had had the twelve-week scan. We had it last week so we were going to tell you whilst we were here.” Clarke speaks up from the door and the whole room spins to look at her. She and Lexa move back across the room and sit back down where they were sat before. “One more threat of violence to either of us and we leave, okay?” Clarke says as she looks around the room. Everyone nods their heads as Lexa stares daggers at Octavia making sure that she nods her head as well. 

“Dad didn’t know anything about the pregnancy, he didn’t even know that we were getting married until the day of the wedding. We asked him to come and visit us and told him what was happening when we got to the court. There was literally us, dad and two of our friends Harper and Monroe so it was really small and quick. It was a quick wedding because we needed it to be or else ruin our chances of getting pregnant this year.” Clarke tells everyone. They hadn’t wanted to get married quite so soon, but this was their big chance to have a baby. They can always renew their vows, the chance to have a child again are a lot slimmer. 

“You told me that you needed to get married because of some paper work. Was that to do with getting pregnant?” Jake asked them. He didn’t like that Abby couldn’t be at the wedding, but they both appeared so desperate to get married so quickly that he made them promise to have a bigger service once everyone knew where they were and what has been going on with them.

“We decided, after we got engaged last year that we wanted children. We started looking at the best options and chose to go for IVF. The health insurance covers me for IVF and because Clarke is listed as my partner on it, I thought that it would cover her as well, but it didn’t unless we were legally married. The Doctor that we chose is one of the best fertility doctors in New York and because of this she has a two-year waiting list. We thought that by the time we would get an appointment we would already be married, but it didn’t work out that way. The doctor got a cancelation in late July and we were offered it, so we had to get married fast so that I could get Clarke fully on my health insurance. That was the paper work side of things.” Lexa explains to Jake. She doesn’t want him thinking that they lied to him when they didn’t. They just didn’t want to tell anyone until they were sure that Clarke was pregnant. 

“Lexa had to take fertility drugs because we used her eggs and I was inseminated with them in September. We went to the Doctors and she confirmed that I’m pregnant. We had the twelve weeks scan last week which is why we had to wait so long before coming here.” Clarke stops to pull out a sonogram picture that she shows her dad who immediately pulls her up into a hug. Abby gets up and looks at the picture as well before giving Clarke a much shorter hug than Jake had. “We really wanted to have this meeting and get everything out in the open before telling anyone. I know that you guys won’t understand fully why we left and in all honesty, we’re not asking you too. The only reason that we’re here is so that we can all finally get closure on everything that has happened.” Clarke feels emotionally and physically drained and isn’t sure how much more she can take today. 

“I need some time to process everything that’s happened today. Maybe we should all leave it for now and meet up again later in the week when everything has sunk in properly.” Costia says. She was doing relatively okay until she found out that not only are Clarke and Lexa married, but they are expecting a baby as well. It’s all just too much for her to handle right now and she needs some time. 

“That sounds like a good idea.” Lexa says as she looks at her wife and can see how much of a tole all of this is taking on her. “We’re in town for another five days, so we could meet up on Wednesday evening if that’s okay with everyone?” Lexa asks because it’s now Monday so that will give everyone some time to digest the information they have been told today. Everyone agrees and Clarke asks her dad to take her and Lexa back to their hotel so that she can get some rest. The rest of the group also disperse so that they can get their thoughts in order as well. A lot of answers have been found today, but there is also a lot more questions to be asked. 

********

Later that evening Costia is at the store buying some groceries when she spots Lexa studying two jars of pickles. The sight almost makes her laugh and she decides to make her way over to the confused brunette. “If you look at those jars any harder they could explode in your hand you know?” Costia teases and laughs a little as she sees Lexa jump.

“Costia, hey.” Lexa says awkwardly before looking back at the pickle jars and putting both of them in her basket. “I didn’t get a chance to ask today, but how have you been?” Lexa asks, genuinely curious. She has often thought about Costia over the past few years and hoped that she has been doing well.

“I’ve been okay. It was hard after you left, but it’s gotten easier as the time has passed. I can see that you look well though, obviously you found a gym in New York that you like. You look happy as well.” It’s obvious that Lexa is still training like she always used to because physically Lexa hasn’t really changed. There is also a spark in Lexa eyes that she has never seen before that looks an awful lot like pure happiness. 

“Yeah, I can’t lie and say that I’m not the happiest I’ve ever been and yeah, I found a new gym just a couple of blocks from our new apartment, so I’m training again. It’s not Indra’s, but it works for me.” Lexa shrugs. She makes a mental note to go and visit Indra whilst she is in town because the woman was such a big part of her life. Sometimes she is sure that she wouldn’t still be here if it wasn’t for Indra.

“You don’t ever have to lie to me Lexa, I’m glad you’re happy, even if you had to hurt me to be.” Costia says in nearly a whisper, but Lexa hears her and her stomach drops.

“Can we talk, just me and you for five minutes without anyone else butting in. I will answer any questions that you have I promise, I just want to explain things one on one.” Lexa asks. She was getting frustrated today when Bellamy and Octavia seemed to be talking over Costia and not really giving her time to talk. She wants Costia to understand that she was the perfect girlfriend, but she just wasn’t the one for Lexa. 

“Sure, why don’t we pay for out things and then we can talk in my car for a few minutes?” Costia wants to know the truth and she will only get the answers that she deserves if she is one on one with Lexa with no one there to interrupt her or get angry. 

“I just need to get some chocolate spread to go with these pickles and then I’m all set.” At the Costia makes a disgusted face at Lexa wondering what the hell is wrong with her. Lexa laughs and clarifies, “Not for me, there for Clarke and her cravings, they’ve only just really started. Watching her eat pickles dipped in Nutella make me feel a little sick, in all honesty.”. Realisation spreads across Costia’s face and then a solemn look because five years ago she thought that it would be her pregnant with Lexa’s baby one day. Lexa quickly makes her way and gets the Nutella before heading to pay with Costia.

Once they have both paid, they make their way out to Costia’s car and get in. Lexa decides to start, “If there was a way that I could have been with Clarke without hurting you I would have. I loved you as a friend, but I just couldn’t deny my love for Clarke. I genuinely believe that she is the love of my life, but I wish there could have been a way for us to be together without hurting anyone.” Both Clarke and Lexa have talked on multiple occasions about how they wish they could have met under different circumstances, but they didn’t and they had to deal with what they were given. 

“I’ve always known that you never intentionally hurt me, but to find out that the woman that I loved and was planning on spending the rest of my life with had been cheating on me and ran away with the woman that she was having an affair with through a letter, destroyed me. I tried to get into a relationship a couple of years ago, but it broke down because I kept thinking that Ontari was cheating on me. I couldn’t trust her and she couldn’t handle that so she broke up with me. I don’t think you really know what you’ve done to me, you’ve broken my ability to trust people Lexa. I get that you and Clarke are some epic love, but your epic love broke two people and hurt others as well.” Costia is trying to explain to Lexa just how much what she did affected her and Bellamy. Even though he is now in a relationship she has seen him sabotage relationships with other girls because he doesn’t want to be hurt again.

“There is nothing that I can say to make it up to you Cos, I wish there was but there isn’t. You know, I always knew that Ontari had a thing for you, that never really bothered me though, I just didn’t like her as a person, but that should have been my first clue. I wasn’t jealous about the fact that other people wanted you, I didn’t really care about it when now, just thinking about someone else touching Clarke makes my blood boil. Everyone gets jealous sometimes, but I never did with you. That should have been a huge warning signal, but I ignored it because we didn’t have a chance for us to break up. Not with our dad’s. If I stayed we would have been forced to marry, leaving was the only way that we could both be free, that I could finally be free of my father.” Lexa tries to explain. It’s difficult to tell someone who’s heart that you broke why you did it and Lexa is struggling to find the right words to express what she was feeling at that time. 

“I can understand not telling your dad or even Clarke not telling Bellamy because I know he has a temper, but why couldn’t you tell me? We were friends before we were together, so how could you just leave me a shitty letter like I meant nothing to you? How could you be so selfish?” As soon as the last words are out of Costia’s mouth she instantly regrets them. She knows that Lexa has had to be selfless all her life for her family, even with her friends to some extent and this is the only selfish thing that she has ever done, but the words are out of her mouth before she can stop them. 

Lexa chuckles humourlessly at that Costia said. “You know what, I was selfish when it came to Clarke, but I deserved to be. I gave up everything for my family and yours, I gave up my passion, the career I wanted, my future and even the prospect of marrying someone for love all in the name of keeping my family happy. I know that after a while you fell in love with me, but remember back to when we were first forced to be together. Remember how much neither of us wanted it. I only ever loved you as a friend and I would have just gone through the motions of being married to you, but I would never have loved you like I love Clarke. I deserved better than to be with someone that I didn’t love just to please my dad, hell you deserve better than to be with someone who didn’t love you in the way that you deserve to be. Yeah, for once in my life I was selfish. That’s not something I will ever regret because now I am married to the love of my life and we are expecting out first child. I didn’t tell you because you were the only person that could have made me stay. I would have stayed because out how much I loved you as a friend, that’s why I didn’t tell you face to face.” With that Lexa opens the door and gets out of the car, but before she shuts the door she looks up to Costia again.

“I can’t regret anything that I did because I’m truly happy in my life in a way I never thought I could be. I wish thing could have been different back then, I wish we could have parted amicably because I know that you and Clarke would have really got along well, but we didn’t. I really hope that you realise that you are an amazing person. I hope that one day you can see that anyone who you choose to be with and who chooses to be with you is one of the luckiest people alive. That they won’t cheat on you because they would be an absolute fool to and that you deserve to be loved in a way I never could. I’m truly sorry for everything that I put you through and hope that one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me, but I will never regret being selfish for once in my life, no matter what anyone says. I need to get back to Clarke, Goodbye Costia.” Lexa says and closes the door before walking back to her hotel carrying the supplies that she needs to satisfy Clarke’s cravings. 

Costia winds down the window and quickly shouts Lexa, “Lexa,” The other woman turns around to look at Costia. “I’m not going to be there on Wednesday, I’ve got the answers I needed, but I need to tell you that you’re going to be an amazing mom. I hope you stay happy with Clarke and you kid, goodbye Lexa.” Costia says and she means it. Lexa gives her a small smile and nod of the head before she is gone, out of Costia’s life for the second time.

Costia just sits in her car with tears streaming down her face. The thing is that what Lexa just said is completely true. She needs to find someone who wants to be with her and isn’t forced to be with her because their father is in business with hers. Maybe now she can move on because she has heard what she needed to from Lexa. She has heard that it was nothing to do with her, it was the fact that Lexa found someone that she wanted to be with and who she could love when Costia wasn’t that person. She thought that she needed Lexa to apologise, but really, she needed to be told the truth. Now that she has, maybe she can finally move on with her life.

********

The second meeting with Bellamy, Abby and the rest of the group went a lot smoother than the first. There was no way that they were ever going to be as close as they once were or that Octavia would ever forgive Clarke for breaking her brothers heart, but at least they all got the closure that they had been seeking for the past five and a half years. Bellamy decide that he didn’t need to be in touch with Clarke again as he had gotten all of the closure he needed but could never forgive the blonde.

Abby would never like Lexa, but she very quickly learned that Clarke and her wife are a package deal. If she wanted to be a part of her daughters and grandbabies lives, then she would have to play nice with the love of her daughter’s life. Abby was still very angry with Jake over his lies, but he promised to make it up to her and never lie to her again.

Lexa was able to start to repair her relationship with Anya, however once Titus found out that she was married he refused to see or speak to her. This wasn’t an issue for Lexa because she had never been close to her father and she actually preferred not to see him. 

When the two women went back to New York they felt like they had had a weight lifted off their shoulders. They also had tentative plans for Anya, Raven, Abby and Jake to come and visit them over new year. Lincoln would have liked to join, but he knew that the trip was far too early for Octavia to even consider. 

The trip hadn’t gone as planned but some good had come out of it in the end. Now they were all ready to finally move onto the next part of their lives without this black cloud hanging over their heads.


End file.
